A friend of mine on an abolitionist animal rights forum recently encountered a bunch of assholes on Facebook because they posted 35 reasons for going vegetarian. It was disheartening to my friend, and I said that vegetarianism was one of those volatile issues that will polarize people and reveal your true friends from detritus filling your life.
I called it an Asshole Litmus Test, and I thought to expand upon that concept. As a fierce individual, I have a lot of shit I believe in and a lot of shit I simply won't budge on. I remember trying to date some friend of a friend, and unbeknown to me, that chick went to an old friend of mine and asked what kind of person I was. They responded, "There are two kinds of people. Those that don't know him, and those that would take a bullet for him. You have to figure out which one you are." I nearly cried on the spot when he told me this.
The maturity of your friends will be partially measured in what or how far they are willing to accept you in spite of what they don't agree with. However, you may grossly overestimate your friends, and while it may be disillusioning to see a friend revealed to be a real bunghole.
This is a work in progress. This helps me to determine if I should not return their calls, ignore them, or slap them so hard they hit the pavement. This list is in no particular order of importance. Just what came to mind.
Can I take them in a fair fight?
Can I take them in an unfair fight? (i.e. armed, unethical strikes, etc)
Are there police around? (Public disturbances are subject to being served a summons)
Do I need to associate with them directly?
Do I need to associate with them through friends, family, and/or loved ones?
Do they owe me anything?
Do I owe them anything?
Are they diametrically opposed to what I believe in?
Are they assholes about it?
Are they inebriated?
Are they in need of medical assistance not caused by self-destructive conditions (over-eating, inebriation, etc)?
Can I distract them with pornography, shiny objects, and/or flatulence?
Can I ignore them?