Michelle Madigan is a Stupid Bitch, Flees in Shame at DefCon

Tell me if this makes sense to you. DefCon is a 15 year old convention drawing a huge crowd of internet security professionals, "freelancers" (gasp - hackers, perhaps?), law enforcement agents, and of course, reporters. Reporters have to pay to get in like anyone else, and they are rigorously screened. After all, you wouldn't want to attend a convention and have some jagoff reporter try and catch you admitting illegal activity on camera, would you?

But that's precisely what Michelle Madigan, a producer for NBC Dateline, wanted to do this past Friday. According to Wired, she tried to bullshit her way into DefCon to out an undercover Fed. What she didn't know or bother to research was that "Spot the Fed" is a long standing tradition at DefCon. It's all in good fun, and the Feds that do get caught usually take it in stride. They sure as shit wouldn't need her help.  She had been asked a number of times if she wanted to obtain press credentials, and she refused. Eventually they lured her into an auditorium where a "Spot the Fed" game was underway. DefCon changed the game from "Spot the Fed" to "Spot the Undercover Reporter."

Eventually the dumb skank figured out that they were on to her, and she bolted with a swarm of hackers in tow. They royally took the piss out of her, and luckily one good soul caught it all on camera. You can view the tasty clip here.

Wow. I have seen some dumb bitches in my life, but Michelle Madigan takes the cake. Was she so arrogant to think that she could bullshit her way into a convention of hackers? Hackers have turned bullshitting into an art form, and this goober thought she could pull a Jedi Mind Trick on them? Considering that she had not only pissed off a HACKER CONVENTION, and that she was hounded until she drove off, I think she'll be lucky if this is the last she'll hear of it. Gee, do you think the simple bitch should have covered up her license plates?

Pop Quiz: Is Newt Gingrich a Moron or a Racist?

This past weekend, Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich spoke to the National Federation of Republican Women, and he made statements that made me wonder if Newt can peel fruit with his feet. "The American people believe English should be the official language of the government. ... We should replace bilingual education with immersion in English so people learn the common language of the country and they learn the language of prosperity, not the language of living in a ghetto."

According to the CNN story, the "crowd of more than 100" was cheering. First off, a group of 100 isn't a crowd - that's a couple of lines at the DMV. Second, any group that is going to cheer for Newt Gingrich is probably so stupid, they wouldn't know that "Talladega Nights" isn't a documentary.

I'm not troubled so much by this little group of cackling bitches as much as what he said. Think about it. This is a great country filled with opportunity, however a jackass like Newt Gingrich is going to say if you aren't fluent in English, tough shit for you. Should anybody living and working in the United States be required to learn English? Absolutely. But how the Hell is someone supposed to learn English? Instead of bilingual educational programs. perhaps Mr. Gingrich would prefer that we beat immigrants upside their heads with dictionaries. Maybe Mr. Gingrich could offer his services and teach English through some Redneck Asshole Mind Meld.

And then there's the real problem of what he said, equating bilngual education with "the language of living in a ghetto." Does he really have that little regard for minorities that he would trivialize their existence in urban America much less alone their contribution to the vast diversity of the American fabric? Is he singling out one or two minorities he especially despises, and is he so much of a chickenshit coward that he won't say that he doesn't like dark and swarthy people? His remarks are incendiary, hateful, and ignorant.

Here's the best part - apparently Grima Wormtongue -err Newt Gingrich- is considering running for President in 2008.

I shit thee not.

Mr. Gingrich has apaprently overlooked the fact that the American people includes citizens as well as people simply working and living here. Our strength as a union comes from our diversity and how we relate to other cultures. Unless we make not just bilingual education but multicultural education mandatory, we will never be as strong as we can be.