It's Not TV, It's Crap

One of the few reasons there is left for me to watch HBO now is "Real Time with Bill Maher." I love that show. I love Bill Maher's "Take No Shit From ANYONE" attitude. There was one episode last season in which some jackass in the audience started yammering about some 9/11 conspiracy, and Bill Maher shouted back to the jackass something to the effect of "Can I get some fucking security in here, or do I have to throw you out myself?" Bill leapt into the audience and along with security, he gave a hearty "va fangu" to the morons. This shut up even a loudmouth like Chris Matthews (who was, of course, in the wingnut seat). One of the best parts of "Real Time with Bill Maher" is his "New Rules" coda segement in which he skewers particularly egregious assholes with a short, yet stinging rule.

Right about now, "Real Time with Bill Maher" is trying to get momentum going for its new season in the midst of the Writers Guild Association strike against The Alliance of Motion Pictures and Television Producers. This has cripppled television, killed shows, and has affected the development of films from script to grossly overpriced tickets. The strike has continued since July 16th, 2007, and while the Directors Guild Association has recently tried to intervene to resolve this conflict, I strongly feel that things are gonna get worse. Bill Maher was able to get some kind of waiver to go on with his show minus the opening monologue, comedic interludes, and unfortunately, "New Rules."

In other words, "Real Time with Bill Maher" has been partially neutered. As a Bill Maher fan, it pains me to say this, but it sucks. The show still has its merits, but imagine if you've driven an Aston Martin DB-5 for years...and someone tells you that you have to ride a Big Wheel until they tell you you can have your DB-5 back. Some shows have actually bought the farm, and it's really tragic that shows like "Scrubs" won't be able to end in the way they dserve because of a bunch of greedy bastards.

Right before July 16th, 2007, there was an insane rush to get scripts approved and put into production at movie studios. They knew the shit was gonna hit the fan for a long time, and they wanted to get their biggest projects taken care of. There will still be big movies, and reality shows have flourished, because for the better part, they're unscripted. That giant sucking wound is not the usual lack of creativity in mass media culture - but the pronounced lack of even rancid shit dressed up to look respectable.

So, while there hasn't been much of anything to watch on TV recently outside of stuff we've seen endless times before and documentaries, I have one question. Why has there been no massive rush to libraries and bookstores? What does it say about us that we'd rather watch recycled old crap than read a book?

The Fall of Rome

Aside from propelling Russell Crowe to megastar status, Ridley Scott's "Gladiator" continues to have a profound impact on pop culture. There have been lots of attempts to do something similar to varying degrees of success, but one standout has been HBO's short lived series, "Rome."

As of this writing, there is only one episode left. That's right, ONE. Never mind that whie the series started off with the rise of Gaius Julius Caesar, and that the Roman Empire extended well past his reign to Constantine (not the movie, you jackass), the series looks to end very prematurely with the rise of Octavian, who history shows will become Emperor Augustus. This is troubling on for a number of reasons.

"Rome" has presented a great number of compelling characters and fleshed-out storylines through no small part of its incredibly talented cast. To try and pick a favorite actor would be like picking out a favorite Single Malt Whisky. It's shows like "Rome" that blur the lines between Leading and Supporting Actors because every single role is played out well. For the record, I'm partial to Kevin McKidd's Lucius Vorenus and Ray Stevenson's Titus Pullo.

But, with ONE FRIGGIN' EPISODE LEFT, there are a great number of storylines to wrap up. It would be a huge testament towards the scriptwriters if they could pull this off within a 1-hour or a 2-hour season finale, but I fear it is hubris to think that everything is going to be finished with the respect that befits such grandeur crafted over a meager span of only 22 episodes.

I have my theories about this. A staggering operating budget split between HBO, Cinecitta, and the BBC is still a staggering operating budget. For this to have succeeded past even another season would have meant that this would have had to have the ratings of virtually every other stellar HBO series combined. As odd as it sounds, it does not look like HBO, Cinecitta, and the BBC could see that "Rome" is a critical and resounding hit deserving of far more than two seasons. I would have liked to have seen something past the impending conflict between Octavian (err.... I mean Augustus) and Mark Antony. I would have liked to have seen Pullo settle down, but perhaps the greatness of "Rome" is in the fact that it never even came close to jumping the shark. There hasn't been one weak moment. NOT ONE. The cynic in me believes that there is a very good chance that even if this was milked out for another season or so, it would have lost some of it's luster. To paraphrase Joe Turkel's character Eldon Tyrell in "Blade Runner," "The star that burns twice as bright burns half as long, and Rome has burned so very, very brightly."

The fanboy in me cries out for more, remembering the short-lived brilliance of the HBO Series, "Carnivale." I can only hope that future series like HBO's upcoming "Preacher" (based on the critically acclaimed DC Vertigo series created by Garth Ennis & Steve Dillon) get more support than "Rome."